kejadian yang tak disangka

Beberapa hari ni,hati aku rasa xsedap hati je..try to figure out..but,dunno how..then,biarkan je...
but today something happen to me..till now still phobia...otw back to my hse with my cousin.tiba2 dia dapat sms frm 1 of our family mengejek dia n say,my csn tgh ada problem besar.otak bercelaru..then dia still ok.still drive mcm biasa..then,dia dpt 1 sms lg..tiba2 dia baling hp dia kuat2..kwn dia ddk sblh and aku ddk seat belakang..then dia bwk kete laju2 and tiba2..omg...dia bawak kereta terhuyung-hayang mcm org mabuk..then yg buat aku phobia,masa dia bawak laju and terhuyung-hayang,lori minyak kat sebelah kiri.betul2 tmpt seat aku ddk..lagi sikit nk langgar lori minyak.sipi je..lori tu betul2 side aku.omg..if kwn dia xtolak stereng ke kanan,hbs la.kereta csn aku n lori minyak berlanggar and dekat situ jugak kereta n lori akan meletup and aku da xda lagi sekarang...still now aku still phobia and teringat kejadian td...nyawa aku hampir hilang tadi..allah selamatkan aku..thanks to Allah..
afta that,my csn stop kereta tepi highway and lepaskan geram dia.haih.aku da takut sgt2 nk biarkan dia drive..aku sms family aku yg sms dia n marah2..then aku ckp,krn sms tu,aku n csn aku blh mati td langgar lori minyak...stop sms my csn..then dia reply..dia ckp sms tu hanya gurauan..nk gurau pun xblh..
yang paling aku sedih sgt2..dia ckp"lantak la korg  nk kena apa pun,aku xnk campur"..bila aku baca je sms ni,ya allah...mcm mana family aku sendiri blh ckp mcm ni kat aku??nyawa kitorang hampir melayang td gara2 sms yg dia hantar..dia reply mcm ni kat aku??aku punya la syg sgt kat,aku da faham sgt...aku xsangka yg dia blh reply mcm tu kat aku selepas dia yang mulakan dulu sms tu..
aku mengaku,salah csn aku..tiba2 naik gila baca sms tu and jadi xbtl and hampir je mati td..tapi,kalau family aku yg sorg tu xstart sms,semua ni xkan terjadi..fine,xsalahkan dia jugak..tapi,knp dia blh ckp mcm tu kat family dia sendiri..manusia mmg mcm ni...
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the past of my life

Our life is so precious
we must to be thank to God
sometimes,i wonder why my life are not happy as i want
but i know, i wont be happy at all
since child, i faced family problems in my life like others too
my family always fighting each other
always blaming each other

when i was at the primary school,i shocked about 1 news from my family
whats the news??i gotta to know
my parents otw to divorce!!
oh my god!!
i cant imagine what my feelings that time
feeling so hurt,sadness and so on
i know my mum and my dad are not happy together
the best way are divorce
i must accept!!

my sis and I try to makes my mum happy
my mum sacrificed all her life to me and my sis
she want us to be sucessfull one day
same as my dad
all i want in this world are to be together in my family eventhough i know thats impossible
but that my dreams
the dreams i know that will never comes true

now,i must focus in my life
whatever happens to my family,i will accept it
even i regret my family like this
i love my family so damn much

i know now my dad happy with his life
my sis and I want to take care of my mum
wanna makes my mum happy
i love my mum and my dad
even my dad got a new family now
but he still love me and my sis so much
i can see that
my father working hard to bear our life
and now, my father became a successful businessman

but i know my mum still hurt till now what happens to her marriage
she want to be like others
happy with beloved husband
but she didnt get that from my dad
she always said to me that she really wanna be happy like others
i dont mind if my mum wanna marry again if she find her true love 
but my sis dont want my mum married again
my sis do that because she dont want my mum suffer again like before
she dont want any guy hurting my mum
now, my sis and I just wanna makes my mum happy
we will take care of my mum no matter what

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what goes around comes around

i feel that i can be away from anything that makes my life suffer...
what i gonna do now??
really dnt have any ideas to think...
it seems like gotta be more worst than before...
i could not imagine what my feelings rite now..
everything im doing,its like nothing ever happen..
y the life supposed to be like this...???
but i believe
what goes around comes around...
maybe im too weak to faced all this things....
shud i just let it go or shudnt??
im afraid if i let it go,im too suffer...
i dnt want to become weak...
now i just realized that im too stupid...
believing people too easy...
i just wanted to be HAPPY!!!!
im trying to do everything the best in my life..
sometimes i feel i wanna go to heaven..
my life problems never ends till the last breath...
now i realized what people said bout u..
i dunno what gonna happen after this...............
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7 facts about me :

1) i love to be myself
2) i love my family damn much
3) hates hypocrite
4) easy going girl
5) helpful
6) hates a liar person
7) always dreaming something that unbelievable

7 things that scares me :

1) cat
2) ghost
3) failure
4) any types of animals
5) sickness
6) hot temper person
7) being a liar

7 song playing in my head lately :

1) i cant imagine me without you by jaci velasquez
2) the climb by miley cyrus
3) eh eh nothing else i can say by lady gaga
4) aku dan dirimu by bunga citra lestari
5) boom boom pow by black eyed peas
6) kiss me through the phone by soulja boy
7) pudar by rossa

7 valuable things in my life :

1)  my family
2)  my friends
3)  handphone
4)  my laptop
5) money
6) happiness
7) wealth

7 "First Time" in my life :

1) lost my happy family time
2) got my own laptop from my mum
3) being head prefects in secondary school which is so so unbelievable
4) coloured my hair
5)  low blood pressure
6) skin problem during form 4
7) lost my eldest uncle

7 Words/Things i always use/say :

1)  handphone
2) laptop
3)  earphone
4) huhu
5) omg
6) damn it
7) haha

7 people i tag :

1) yeoh kim bee
2) mirna lestary
3) jeanne
4) tan peixi
5) sheera soraya
6) el
7) munira

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full day of classes

~ monday 28 sept ~
my class started at 9am.accounts.omg!i didnt do any of accounts homework..well,very excited raya..but i can finish it at class.after class,we have 2 hours 30 mins,i and mirna decide to go library since we have accounts 2pm we have qm usual as semester 1..who finish the homework can go,i went back home at 4pm..

~ tuesday 29 sept ~
i came early today because need to do something..need to go cimb bank,public bank and maybank..then at 1130am,i had my lunch with my friends..we went to mcd..after that,we went to account class started at,sir said,just finish it our homework..after finish our homework,mirna said she hungry and ask me to accompany her to go eat..then,i asked sir permission...ahaks mirna,sir membebel with u arounds 15mins..haha..the next class started at 3.15pm.economic class..we're studying new chapter..thank god,this sem only got 3chapter to recover till dec exam..good..hehe..

~ wednesday 30 sept ~
today,i came early too..wait mirna at mcd 10.15am..we went to maybank and popular to bought stationeries there..then,we went to mcd to bought our lunch..we ate at class..we reach college early today..after ate,i sleep at sleepy..when class start,wow..i cant open my eyes..too,i just thinking my bed and my pillow...hehe..thank god today we still didnt received our economics assignment..yeay!!haha

~ thurday 1 oct ~
as usual,came early today..i followed my sis..she sent me to lrt station today..reach college at 8am..just read newspaper and playing games..when class started at 8.45am,mirna still didnt come to class,..i called her n she said that she sick and cant go to class today..then ok sit beside me..we finish our exercise at 10am...then,i went back home and sleep...hehe

~ friday 2oct ~
today are the day that all of my class scared off...our result is coming out today!!!im so nervous okay...especially my accounts paper..huh..wishing that i will pass all the paper..please wishing me luck today..
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~reality in life~

my life started to be worst and more even worst
i tried to make all the things in good and best position
what i got from there???
there's nothing!!!
since many years ago
i wanted to be happy in my life
but i know
its hard to be happy
why everything i done is wrong in your eyes???
since child, i live in a lot of challenges
challenges come n go,come n go
like air in our life

what are my dreams???
my dreams
i want my happy family back
but i know
i will never never got that back

even i faced a lot of problems
i tried to smile to everyone arounds me

sometimes,people do not appreciate us
people think that im useless,bitches n bla bla bla
i have pride ok!!!

i treat u nicely
u treat me like s**t

People's minds change

Mines the same

People's lives change

But I won't...I won't let go

I won't let go

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~beloved school friends~


i went out with my beloved friends since so long didnt meet them.we went to klcc.buka puasa,sheera,her bf,dekla,rochelle,alifa and first,we want eat at chilli's..but,at 6pm,we went to chilli's...omg...peoples lining up till the end..huh...then,we went to dome..finally got place there...

my bestfriends...i love u all guys...really2 enjoyed with u all that day...hopefully,we will meet again for the next time okay...bye..
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movie day

today,me,kim,weng hoong,yau,kelvin,kelly,janice and vonne went to times square to watch going to ts wif janice and kelly...when we almost reached ts,its raining...we run..haha...then,kim,weng hoong and yau went to,janice and kelly just walking around...we wait kelvin at cinema...all of us want to watch orphan..but kelvin dont want..he said,so boring..haha..then we have some argument there...dunno which movie we want to watch...
finally,we watch orphan..hehe..
orphan is scary movie for me..when esther want to kill someone,i shock and close my scary..
kim,im sorry if i get u shock too..haha...u beside,u can see my face how when i shock..haha...u laughing at me when i funny my face???hahaah...i know its funny...because my face showing that im really2 shock..haha
after we watch movie,kim,weng hoong and yau went back's hse had celebration..father's bday...
so me,janice.kelly,vonne and kelvin went to old town..they wanna to,i followed them since the time too early..but i didnt fasting..hehe...
i busy with my phone..messaging and games...then,4 of them stared at me..haha...they ask me so many questions...damn shy..the questions that they ask me such as
~what my feeling to....
~what my status now
~friend or special friend
~we're close and too obvious
~always with...
hahaha...i need to answer all...
when i gave it my answer,they dont believe me and keep asking..haha...damn shy...
only me and ........ know what happen to us...hehe...
guys,im happy today with u all...=))
then i went back because my sis wait me at bukit jalil station...fetch my mum at hse then we went to for eid....suddenly,my stomach so pain...i cant even walk properly...maybe gastric..dunno...i rest for awhile...but still pain...then,we buka puasa at san francisco steakhouse...a lot of food there...i ate all food there..haha...until my stomach fully of foods..hehe..eventhough my stomach pain,i still can eat because im so hungry..hehe..thank god my stomach ok after i ate...hehe...then,we bought things and we went back home....
thats all for today...hehe...
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~life must go on~

am i bad ?

am i selfish ?
am i heartbreaker ?

happiness comes around me
sadness comes around me

i wanna be happy in my life
i wanna be good in my life
i wanna be perfect in my life


i cant make it myself
i cant be happy,good and perfect in one times
nothing lasts forever

sometimes, we do badly to the another person
sometimes,people do badly to us

i try to avoid looking forward or backward
and try to keep looking upward

challenges comes around me
each challenges makes me down

please give me strength to faces all this
i just a human being

i didnt show my sadness
i tried to be a happy person
i tried to cover my sadness

There is no end...
There is no beginning...
There is ONLY the infinite passion of life...
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~first week of second semester~

accounts was the first class in second semester.damn...sir said 5 person failed so scared because i didnt do well in accounts...hopefully,i will not fail that paper..sir gave us homework..exam paper that we done it...i must finish before 7 sept...
after class finished,me,kim,kelvin and theg thai went to watch movie...we went to times square and watch "UP"...nice movie...i like the husband and wife that always loving each others until dead..then,we went to sushi king to eat...hahaah...i have fun with u all guys...thanks....
later,we went back home...after i reached home,i wanna sleep...suddenly,my sis called me and said we must go to my auntie's house because all my family there...we buka puasa together...after eat.we went back home...damn tired...huhu

today,the whole of my family buka puasa at,my sis fetch me at downstairs and we went to my grandma's house first....then,we went to the restaurant..we book 1 room and all my family sit at that room...but not enough place...the kids must sit outside..hahaah....i ate a lot today..hehe..since we took buffet..i can eat whatever i want until my stomach full of food..hahah...then we went back home.....
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genting day

very excited because im going to genting with my beloved cousins...we went there by car...5 of us...when we reached there,its not really2 cold wearing sleeveless need to wear sweater...then,we played outdoor game first...but,i didnt play space shot..its really2 makes me scared...haha...after we all finished played outdoor games,we played indoor games...then,we eat just snap 1 picture only..hehe..others in my cousin's friend really2 enjoyed there...

after reach kl,we went to my cousins uptown damansara...we lepaking there and talking2 until 1am..haha..then,my cousin slept at my hse..when we otw back to my hse,my cousin ask me to drive her car..she stopped at bangsar and im drove the car..that was the first time im drive car after i got my driving licence last may...thank god,im still remembering how to drive car..hahah...

the next day,we went to my grandma hse..hehe..i drive car again..from my hse to kelana jaya..yeah,i can drive finally..haha..its really2 makes me la..just still have confident to drive car..
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holiday week

im stayed at my auntie's hse,mont kiara...we went out together and went to the usual,i bought cranberry candle for my hse and room...then,we went to the auntie and me shopping together..after that,we went to my grandma hse to visit my grandma..later,i went back to mont kiara..

my auntie do for me favourite,chicken sandwich..haha..then,i help my aunt to cooked fettucini and spagethi to bring to my grandma hse...we went to my grandma hse..talking2..around 6pm,i went out wif my cousins..we went to tropicana shopping complex to bought movie ticket at midnite..damn bored this shopping complex..nothing there..then,we went to my cousin's girlfriend restaurant to eat there...we're talked about the past...then,we went to one utama and bought movie tickets..same movie that i watched last week,the proposal..after that,we went to setapak i forgot..we played pool...that was my first time playing pool..i didnt know how to cousin teach me.then,we beat...who can be the the last,my balls have 5 and my cousins balls have 2...i dont want to lose..then,im cheating...haha..i put my balls at the end of the hole...aha..after we all play,we went eat...i ate naan 4am eat naan cheese...later,i will get fat..haha..otw to my grandma hse,we're singing together at car..haha...reach at my grandma hse at 5 am...

i woke up at,i have dentist going to appointment..damn pain my teeth..i cant eat..i only can eat porridge,bread..haih...since my grandma went to mont kiara,i decide to sleep at my grandma hse with my cousins and my sis fetch my mum at my grandma hse..then my sis and my mum went back home...

woke up early in the morning because today i must go to library segi for my islamic assignment...we have discussion group...we went to breakfast first..then we went to the library...after our discussion almost done,we went back...we went to kampung baru to eat went back to my hse since almost 1 week i didnt stayed at my hse..miss my hse,my room,my pillow..haha...

the best going to genting today with my cousins....
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saturday time

saturday is my islamic class...damn bored this class...but i must attend this class because i have quiz for assignment marks...guess what??i didnt read all..hehe..just a lil only...the lecturer gave paper to me..huh!!i dont know some questions because i didnt read..heheh...mirna also didnt read..haha...then,my friend,eeqbal,he sms me for the answer.haha..i just gave it to him what i know only...then,he sms me what the answer that he,we changes the answer..haha...

after class finished,3 of us went to the library to found the books that have our assignment topic...only 1 book have answer..but not all..haih..then,me and mirna plan to go pavillion to find another books for our assignment..then,we went to the pavillion...we call eeqbal to join us because he also in our group..then,he said he have stomach pain..hahaha...its ok la..

both of us go eat together because we're so hungry...heheh...

after that,we go to the toilet...then,we snap pictures before we go out from the toilet...hahah...takda kerja...

after that,we go to the bookstores and found books...but,dont have...huhuhu...we went to the klcc and then im go back to the kelana jaya...

after reach at my grandma house,my auntie,makyang call me...she ask me to come to her house at mont nite,im going to my auntie house with my cousin syahira....we went to swimming at nite...but,only 3 mins im going to swimmig...its very2 cold...huh...then i and my auntie went to the sauna for 30 mins...

we go back,take shower,eat and watch movie together...then we sleep...heheheehh...
thats all my story for saturday....thanks for read!!!
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~im dedicate this for him~

saat mula waktu perkenalan kita,hatiku terasa begitu bahagia...
saat mula waktu perkenalan kita,engkau telah menunjukkan kasih sayangmu terhadapku...
saat mula waktu perkenalan kita,engkau dan aku bagai isi dengan kuku...

hatiku mula berdetik...
engkau bagaikan permata yang telah mengisi kekosongan hatiku ini...
hatiku pada saat ini teramatlah kosong...
engkau telah hadir dalam hidupku dan mengisi kekosongan hatiku ini...

engkau yang aku kenali...
telah menjagaku,mengambil berat tentang diriku...
engkau hadir dalam hidupku pabila aku sangat sangat memerlukanmu...
hadirmu dalam hidupku telah menyinari hidupku yang kesunyian ini...

aku ingin mengenalimu dengan lebih lagi...

a bestie is someone who cares,
someone who is always there for me...

a bestie is someone is special,
someone who I can tell everything...

a bestie who will never betray,
no matter who against me...

a bestie is someone who I can rely on,
not else than u ....

doesnt mean that I didnt show my fullest care and love to u,
i forget u and everything u do and supported me through my hard times!!
u will always in my mind and in my heart...

a star has 5 ends,
a square has 4 ends,
a triangle has 3 ends,
a line has 2 ends,
a life has 1 ends
our relationship will never ends.....
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~the week of examination~

im just finish my exam yesterday..thank god..finally,im finish my exam...during last week and this week,im very2 tired..have to work out every nite to study study study..huh!!damn tired...first paper was quantitative methods..actually,when i was do this paper,only half hour i can finish it...but,im checking my paper for a few times to see whether its correct or not...after finish qm paper,i and mirna go to eat at mcd..we're very hungry..hehe...then mirna,i,kim,weng hoong,kelvin and yau went to the library to study ACCOUNTS..haha...we book 1 room...actually,we're not focus..haha...we're busy talking to each other..haha...that time,yau asked question to mirna..but,mirna didnt heard that because shes listen to music,radio..hahaha...then,we're get bored to study accounts..well,all of us tired..hehe..then,we went back..
second paper was killing paper,accounts..when i looked at the paper, accounts not try to do it a few times.change this,change that,but still not balance...haih..what to do...depreciation also very hard to answer...haih...thank god i can answer petty cash and mcq..huhu...then the time was over...huh..i thaught only a few people said that accounts are tough paper..but almost the whole class said too...
then,the third paper was english first,i can do it..but suddenly,i got headache and stomach pain..shit...i cant answer it carefully...i cant focus on my english paper...when i got headache,i cant do anything..i have low blood pressure..haih..i dont know how was my english paper...haih...its ok la...its passed already...i went back and take medicine then go sleep..after i woke up,im ok..
then,i started to reads economic...the last paper was my economic paper...that day,my economic paper start at asked me if i want to follow him to study together with him and weng hoong...since im stay alone in my house,im followed,we met at mcd...then,kim said so hot there..hahaha...yeah..its,we went to the library and book 1,kim,weng hoong and kelvin study econs..haha...we're very focus..hehee..then,we went to eat before the exam started...we went to mcd,but,its full..then,we went to mamak and eat..after eat,we went to the last paper,,yeah..thank god i can answer my econs paper..only mcq are a bit tricky question..then i answer my 3rd forgot the terms of demand and supply..haha...but its ok...only terms of demand and supply i forgot...other question i can answer it..question 4 are easy to me because im already remember all about planned,i just write finish my econs paper at 3.15pm..but,i heard its raining,i just checking2 my paper...then at 3.45pm,i go out...when i went out,only me and janice..haha...we talk about the econs paper...then kaysha,citra and kim go out..we waiting for mirna,but im waited her 30 mins...since my sis wait for me at bukit jalil 4.30 pm...i went back with kim,weng hoong,kelvin and yau...citra took for me the timetable for 2nd semester...shit..i dont like this 2nd sem timetable...huh...have a few day my class finish at 5.15, not happy with that...well,bulan puasa is coming sure the train are pack..huh...nvm,mirna i think both of us always buka puasa at outside...hehe...
after my sis fetch me,we went home and change cloth...then me,my sis and my mum went out...we went to one sis said since i last exam,she want me,my mum and her went to dinner and watch absurd..haha.because my sis not like that...shes always busy...24 hours busy..hehe...then we went to one utama...auntie yang and uncle shah already wait us,we eat and talk2...auntie yang said,since my exam over,i must sleep at her house untill my next sem start..haha...then,me,auntie yang,my sis and my mum watched movie..uncle shah had meeting and abang ijad,4 of us watch the proposal,..the best movie..i like sandra bullock acting..the best movie..after watch movie,we sent auntie yang to her house at mont kiara..then,we went back...when i reach home,i online..chatting with kim and mirna..then,kim said he want to,i think,i want to accompany him to study..but,im tired...sorry,im just stay at my house...sleep..sleep...haha...tired for a week..hehe..
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first blog

hye guys..this was my first time doing this blog..actually i dont want too..but some of my friends ask me to do this and mirna,i done it..hehe..well,this is my first time doing,i might be confusing to edit or post anything..hehe..if i really have a free time,for sure,i will always edit this blog since im holiday now until 23rd august..welcome to my blog..hehe
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